Crafting Your Law School Personal Statement: Keep it Tight

Over the next four days, we’ll highlight one takeaway daily from Marion Roach Smith’s approach to memoir that will help you craft a strong personal statement. Also, be sure to check out her memoir manifesto.

Keep it tight. Focus only on the experiences, sentences, and words that you absolutely need to support your argument and demonstrate your growth in the piece. You want to go deep, not broad. Adding in additional stories can distract the reader, and potentially lose them. Once you have demonstrated growth and made your argument, your personal statement is complete. Fight the urge to turn it into an autobiography or a resume.

Crafting Your Law School Personal Statement: Keep the Audience in Mind

Over the next four days, we’ll highlight one takeaway daily from Marion Roach Smith’s approach to memoir that will help you craft a strong personal statement. Also, be sure to check out her memoir manifesto.

Don’t forget your audience. Your memoir should hit on universal themes that are relatable to the reader. When you’re writing, and more importantly editing and rewriting, keep in mind how your audience will take in what you’re saying. Did you provide enough detail of the experiences to show growth and to make your argument? Did you provide too much or extraneous detail? Were you vulnerable and honest in your writing? 

Crafting Your Law School Personal Statement: Deploy Details

Over the next four days, we’ll highlight one takeaway daily from Marion Roach Smith’s approach to memoir that will help you craft a strong personal statement. Also, be sure to check out her memoir manifesto.

Think small. Memoir requires that you share your growth with the audience, which can be done effectively by incorporating small details. Smith notes the power of observation for showing the reader your journey to transcendence. She writes, “Never forget about the small stuff and how it reveals the big stuff of life.” Small details also create a relationship with your reader, drawing them into the experience. 

Crafting Your Law School Personal Statement: Structure

Over the next four days, we’ll highlight one takeaway daily from Marion Roach Smith’s approach to memoir that will help you craft a strong personal statement. Also, be sure to check out her memoir manifesto.

Structure. Memoir is created out of three components. Prior to writing, sit down and consider the building blocks of your piece.

1) What is this about (think: universal, e.g., connecting with and empowering your team, trying and trying again to find the right approach to solve a complex problem)?

2) What is your argument (something that you learned based on your experience)?

3) What experiences from your life will you deploy to prove your argument? 

Crafting Your Law School Personal Statement: Lessons from Memoir Writing

A memoir requires more than a recounting of events from your life. Rather, you must show the reader that you’ve experienced transcendence. Marion Roach Smith calls it the “golden rule” of memoir. She writes, “Memoir is not about what you did. Memoir is about what you did with it.” The experience is not the focus or the reason for the writing, just the vessel for sharing a more universal learning with your audience. 

Smith expands this thought when she writes, “Specifically memoir is a promise from me that I experienced something, I’ve given some real thought to it and now know what it is, and now I am going to share what I now know with you. The promise is not that I am going to recreate the experience or make you relive it with me.” 

This approach also aligns with what admissions committees are seeking in your personal statement. From your past experiences, they want to learn more about your potential and character. Show them how a recent discovery helped you evolve, how you’ve refined your abilities in innovation and/or leadership, and/or teamwork. Prove to them that you are ready to pursue a graduate education and career path.

Over the next four days, we’ll highlight one takeaway from Marion Roach Smith’s approach to memoir that will help you craft a strong personal statement. Check in daily. Also, be sure to check out her memoir manifesto. 

Building Your List of Law Schools: Tuition

With nearly 200 ABA accredited law schools out there, picking 12 to 15 to apply to can feel daunting. This week, we’ll explore how to use rankings productively as well as some other relevant factors to keep in mind as you build your school list.  

Tuition. Depending on your goals and financial situation, including any undergraduate debt you carry, it may make sense to opt for a lower cost in-state program over an elite institution. Either way, calculate the expected cost-benefit of different categories of schools: private versus public as well as in-state versus out-of-state. 

Building Your List of Law Schools: Geography

With nearly 200 ABA accredited law schools out there, picking 12 to 15 to apply to can feel daunting. This week, we’ll explore how to use rankings productively as well as some other relevant factors to keep in mind as you build your school list.  

Geography. Where you are located plays an important role in your ability to network. If you know where you want to live post-graduation, consider applying to programs that are within that city or state. Similarly, if your goal is to specialize in a particular field (finance, tech, government) or a specific type of law (public service), consider applying to programs that are located near one of the industry’s hubs. This will likely allow you more opportunities to intern, volunteer, or network during the school year. 

Building Your List of Law Schools: Career Placement

With nearly 200 ABA accredited law schools out there, picking 12 to 15 to apply to can feel daunting. This week, we’ll explore how to use rankings productively as well as some other relevant factors to keep in mind as you build your school list.  

Career Placement. If you know what type of career you would like to pursue after law school, dig into the employment placement reports of each school you are considering. Where are graduates getting internships and jobs? Which organizations regularly come to campus for on-campus recruiting? Data is also available for easy comparison on the Law School Transparency website. 

Building Your List of Law Schools: Rankings & Prestige

With nearly 200 ABA accredited law schools out there, picking 12 to 15 to apply to can feel daunting. We can’t tell you that rankings don’t matter (spoiler alert: sometimes, they really do!), but we can tell you that there is more to consider than just published rankings. This week, we’ll explore how to use rankings productively as well as some other relevant factors to keep in mind.  

Rankings and Prestige. There’s been a lot of buzz over the past year about the efficacy of rankings. While rankings should not be your only metric, they are relevant. For students who know that they want to pursue a federal judicial clerkship or a position in a big law firm post-graduation (most 2023 graduates entering large law firms went to a school in the US News Top 20), attending a top-ranked law school can provide significant benefit. 

According to ABA data analyzed by Reuters this year, over 20 percent of the 2023 law graduates at University of Chicago, Yale, and Stanford (top schools in U.S. News & World Report’s Best Law Schools ranking) obtained federal clerkships upon graduation. But this does not mean that securing such a role would be impossible without having attended a “top” school. Several law schools outside of the top 20, including University of Kentucky, Brigham Young University, and George Mason University, have also placed students in federal clerkships. 

We encourage you to familiarize yourself with the rankings, paying particular attention to the metrics and outcomes that mean the most to you. They are a productive starting point for further investigation. And be sure to take a look at Princeton Review’s Category-Based Rankings, which can provide helpful insight into the various components of the law school experience (Best Classroom Experience, Best Career Prospects, Best Quality of Life, etc.). 

A To-Do List for Your Personal Statement: See Feelings as Information

This week on the blog we’re providing you with a to-do list for your personal statement and school-specific essays. Check back frequently as we’ll provide one key area of focus each day this week. 

See feelings as information. If you can state or allude to how an experience made you feel, you will paint a dynamic picture for the admissions team. You can include "negative" emotions like fear but also positive ones like joy, camaraderie, and pride.

We don't believe in self-aggrandizing but don't self-deprecate either. We think the "pride"-vibe you're aiming for is best explained by organizational psychologist and author Adam Grant: "Downplaying your achievements is not the antidote to appearing arrogant. Humility is acknowledging your weaknesses, not denying your strengths. Generosity is elevating others, not diminishing yourself. Owning your success doesn't make you a narcissist—it makes you a role model.”

(Bonus!) Understand that you will rewrite most things. Embrace it. Know now that having to write several drafts is not a failure. It is a way to success.

A To-Do List for Your Personal Statement: Don't Avoid Fear

This week on the blog we’re providing you with a to-do list for your personal statement and school-specific essays. Check back frequently as we’ll provide one key area of focus each day this week. 

Show fear when it's applicable. Similarly, the "show no fear" image people often want to flaunt in their applications doesn't seem authentic because it isn't. You have many terrific qualities; being 100% fearless isn't one of them. You've experienced fear, whether it was about not finishing your Honors thesis on time or confronting a colleague about a sexist comment. Good. Fear helps you assess a situation, prepare yourself to address it properly, and take (sometimes very cautious) action. Addressing a fear can be quite humbling—it's another way to show vulnerability in your application. And fear can be a pathway to courage.

A To-Do List for Your Personal Statement: Show Self-awareness

This week on the blog we’re providing you with a to-do list for your personal statement and school-specific essays. Check back frequently as we’ll provide one key area of focus each day this week. 

Show that you're self-aware. Many of our clients shy away from sharing examples of their weaknesses or times they've made mistakes in their Personal Statement. But replaying a fumble is an opportunity to then share actions you took to remedy a situation and lessons you learned. That said, not every issue you present must be one that you've fully resolved. For example, say you're great at presenting ideas on paper but you have a hard time speaking up in professional settings. Likely, one beautiful, clarifying moment didn't change that forever. That's something you work on over a long period. You may share an anecdote where you spoke well in front of an intimidating group and how you prepared to do it. Then say how you will continue improving your verbal communication skills and how you plan to exercise that muscle regularly in the future. That's a stronger, more realistic take than "I will never have this problem again!”

A To-Do List for Your Personal Statement: Remember what Resonates

This week on the blog we’re providing you with a to-do list for your personal statement and school-specific essays. Check back frequently as we’ll provide one key area of focus each day this week. 

Remember what resonates most with reviewers. Passion. Depth of Impact. Potential. We probably don't need to explain passion to you. Depth of impact means expressing how much an experience and your actions during it changed things within you and/or outside of you. Potential is you exemplifying one or more qualities that medical, law, or business schools admire: Leadership, collaboration, critical thinking, etc. You know these from your brainstorm “buckets."

Related:

Your Med School Application: Build a Brainstorm Document

Your Law School Application: Build a Brainstorm Document

Your MBA Application: Build a Brainstorm Document

A To-Do List for Your Personal Statement: Emphasize Past Experiences

This week on the blog we’re providing you with a to-do list for your personal statement and school-specific essays. Check back frequently as we’ll provide one key area of focus each day this week. 

Emphasize past experiences. Focus on what you've done more than on what you want to do. So many of our clients think their essays should exclusively be about their fantasy future. But this isn't a magic carpet ride. Your rug must be on the ground. What you have accomplished and learned is the only proof that you are committed to the study and practice of medicine, law, or business. (We use that phrase a lot because you should be reinforcing this commitment throughout your application.) 

Overcoming Loneliness

In our next Emotional Intelligence (EI) Friday blog series, we will examine loneliness by considering research on social isolation in the workplace. We will discuss who is affected, the psychological effects of prolonged loneliness, and how you can support yourself or others who may need your help. We hope you enjoy this three-part series.

Click here to read Part 1 of this series. 

Click here to read Part 2 of this series.

So, what should you do if you are experiencing loneliness? Being aware of the dangers of prolonged loneliness is a starter. Below, we have also compiled suggestions for keeping loneliness at bay, for yourself or within your workplace or network.

1. Take cues from your loneliness. If you feel lonely at work or in your personal life, act on the emotional prompt! Do not ignore the feeling or focus on work to the detriment of your own professional, social, and physical well-being. Consider how you can find more consistent person-to-person interaction. If you work remotely or travel frequently, think about facilitating work discussions over video conference or the phone rather than relying on email or instant messaging.

2. Form personal relationships. While you’re at work, speak to people and don’t allow yourself to rely solely on emails or other technology to communicate. Ask people about their lives outside work and tell them about yours. Leave your desk to have lunch and invite someone to walk and/or eat with you. Take the occasional coffee break with peers. Join office committees or participate in community service activities. In the Work Connectivity survey, almost three-fourths of Gen Z and just under 70 percent of Millennials say that they would be more inclined to stay with their company if they had more friends. As a manager working to staunch loneliness on your team, Barsade and Ozcelik warn against falling into inauthentic means of relationship-building such as holiday parties or company picnics. Relationships are built in small groups by people sharing about their lives. Large parties often result in people feeling more isolated as they witness the socially connected enjoying the event.

3. Find shared meaning. According to a Harvard Business Review study, finding shared meaning with colleagues—understanding the meaning that they derive from the work and connecting it with the meaning that you find in the work—creates meaningful “social cohesion” and insulates team members from feeling isolated. This also addresses Barsade and Ozcelik’s point about the meaning and identity that younger generations are looking for in their careers. Younger generations are seeking to be part of something bigger, not just to receive a paycheck. This may also provide a way to connect with others when there are not obvious shared interests or a foundation for a relationship.

4. Work for companies and managers who take their emotional culture seriously. Some companies have cultures that are more prone to driving isolation than others. Consider this as you look for jobs. Do the employees seem connected beyond meeting corporate goals? Do they seem to know and care for each other on a more personal level? “Mandy O’Neill (management professor, George Mason University) and I have done some work in emotional culture—the norms around what emotions you’re allowed to express at work and what you’re better off suppressing. We found that in emotional cultures of companionate love [that include] care, compassion, and tenderness, even lonely employees were more likely to be perceived as approachable and committed to the organization… Anything that a manager can do in terms of creating a culture that sends out cues that are supportive is helpful,” Barsade said. When interviewing, look for signs that your manager and co-workers will be interested in forming real relationships with you that extend beyond your work together.

The Loneliness Epidemic

In our next Emotional Intelligence (EI) Friday blog series, we will examine loneliness by considering research on social isolation in the workplace. We will discuss who is affected, the psychological effects of prolonged loneliness, and how you can support yourself or others who may need your help. We hope you enjoy this three-part series.

Click here to read Part 1 of this series. 

The reasons for the rise in workplace loneliness are many, and in some ways, apparent. Technology has allowed us greater efficiency in reaching out to coworkers and peers, without truly interacting with them. The Work Connectivity study found that, “almost half of an employee’s day is spent using technology to communicate versus in-person.” Additionally, working remotely and having constant access to emails has not only decreased our likelihood of forming meaningful relationships with our co-workers, but also can negatively impact our relationships outside of the workplace. Consequently, based on the nature of the work, different professions have greater rates of reported loneliness. Lawyers, doctors, engineers, and scientists are the most lonely while those with more social jobs such as sales and marketing report lower levels of loneliness.

Sigal Barsade and Hakan Ozcelik, management professors at California State University, Sacramento, point also to the importance that careers have in shaping Millennials’ identities and creating relationship opportunities, in an interview with knowledge@Wharton. “I think employees have an increasing level of expectations from their organization simply because our professions make up a huge component of our identity. We are not doing our jobs just for a paycheck; we want to be a part of the group. We want to be respected. We want to feel that we are having a good quality of life. I think this is getting more profound with the new generation. They might be more relationship-oriented than we are, so it’s important for companies to take that into account. They need to create that relational environment and provide opportunities for employees to build relationships,” Ozcelik said.

Moreover, Barsade and Ozcelik observe that loneliness begets loneliness, meaning that prolonged feelings of isolation harm an individual’s social behaviors and impact their networks. Theoretically, loneliness should serve as a signal. It can and should be a transient emotional state that motivates a person to seek out connections with others, particularly useful when a person is in a new environment. However, prolonged loneliness causes behavioral changes that deter interactions. 

“What the psychology literature has shown is that once loneliness is an established sentiment—you’ve decided you’re lonely—you actually become less approachable. You don’t listen as well. You become more self-focused. All sorts of things happen that make you less of a desirable interaction partner to other people. We found that was one of the things that explained the lower performance. The co-workers of lonely people found them less approachable. Because of that, they didn’t share things and didn’t get the resources they needed. By the way, the literature showed it’s not that they have lower social skills. Loneliness makes it happen,” Barsade said.

Barsade and Ozcelik also point out that existing research shows that loneliness can be “contagious,” afflicting networks and driving negative changes in employee behaviors and interactions throughout teams and organizations. 

Learning to Value the Personal Side of Your Professional Life

In our next Emotional Intelligence (EI) Friday blog series, we will examine loneliness by considering research on social isolation in the workplace. We will discuss who is affected, the psychological effects of prolonged loneliness, and how you can support yourself or others who may need your help. We hope you enjoy this three-part series.

Being single. Living alone. Moving to a new city. Working remotely. Frequent work travel. Sound familiar? While Millennials and Gen Z are generally thought to be the most socially connected of generations, the truth is more nuanced. Many characteristics of the young professional lifestyle are triggers for loneliness, or “the distressing experience that occurs when one’s social relationships are perceived to be less in quantity, and especially in quality, than desired.”

A 2018 study by Cigna and Ipsos found that while most American adults are lonely, Generation Z and Millennials report higher levels of loneliness than older generations. Similarly, data collected by The Economist and the Kaiser Family Foundation, found that in the U.S., the majority of those between 18 and 49 were classified as lonely (59 percent) compared to less than half of those over 50 (41 percent). And, the negative effects of loneliness have been well-documented. In 2015, UCLA researchers found that social isolation triggers a physiological response causing chronic inflammation, which increases the risk for heart disease, stroke, cancer, and Alzheimer’s disease. A 2015 meta-analysis out of Brigham Young University, which included 70 studies, found that lonely people have a 26 percent higher risk of dying, controlling for age and health status. Other studies have linked loneliness to eating disorders, drug abuse, sleep deprivation, depression, alcoholism, and anxiety.

But loneliness isn’t just a personal problem. Sigal Barsade, a Wharton management professor who researches workplace loneliness, says, “People tend to think that if you’re lonely, you’re lonely everywhere. But that’s not true. What research has shown is that you can be lonely in your private life, in your family life, in your romantic life—it depends on the place.” Certainly, you can be lonely in your professional life. And, just as loneliness is harmful to your health, it is also harmful to your career. 

Recent research on the effects of loneliness in the workplace show that loneliness brings detrimental consequences to an individual’s job performance, satisfaction, likelihood of promotion, and engagement and tenure with a company. And, not surprisingly, loneliness is pervasive amongst the youngest members of the workplace. The Work Connectivity study, published by Future Workplace in partnership with Virgin Pulse, surveyed 2,000 managers and employees and found that just over half feel lonely always or very often. At 47 percent, Millennials were the loneliest followed by Generation Z (45 percent). Generation X and Baby Boomers fared better at 36 percent and 29 percent, respectively. While loneliness can affect any demographic group, the survey found that men were more likely than women to report being lonely (57 percent versus 43 percent) and introverts were much more likely than extroverts (63 percent versus 37 percent).

Listening to Connect

We’re excited to introduce “Emotional Intelligence (EI) Fridays” on the blog, where we will hone in on how to develop and implement these softer skills. 

Our first topic of focus will be listening, a critical skill for doctors, lawyers, and (future) CEOs alike. We hope you enjoy this three-part series.

Click here to read Part 1 of this series. 

Click here to read Part 2 of this series. 

Learning to listen, as with any skill, takes practice and time. Julian Treasure in his Ted Talk on Conscious Listening, spoke compellingly on the power of sound to connect us to our world, and to each other. “I believe that every human being needs to listen consciously in order to live fully—connected in space and time to the physical world around us, connected in understanding to each other, not to mention spiritually connected, because every spiritual path I know of has listening and contemplation at its heart,” he said. 

Treasure recommended daily listening exercises, which may help to attune you once again to listening, to hearing the noise in your environment (much of which, you’re likely tuning out) and to promoting your ability to be mindful and connected in a loud and busy world.

1. Sit in three minutes of silence to “reset your ears and to recalibrate.” This will allow you to pay more attention to sounds that you do hear afterwards. Treasure notes that if silence is impossible (for you NYC residents!), quiet is good too. 

2. In a noisy environment with competing sounds, try to differentiate the sounds that you are hearing. Treasure uses the example of a coffee bar. Listen for the “channels” of noise: people having conversations, the grinding of the coffee, the door opening and closing, typing sounds, ringing of cellphones, shoes squeaking on the floor, etc.

3. Listen for and try to take pleasure in everyday sounds that you may routinely tune out. The dryer, birds chirping, kids playing in the park. Instead of filtering out sounds as you go through your day, seek to savor a few. 

4. Each day you use “filters” in your listening to pare down the multitude of sounds in the world to those which you give your attention to. For example, you may opt for passive listening at the beach to take in the many pleasant sounds: the ocean, birds, people laughing, etc. Alternatively, when your partner joins you, you may focus on their voice over the waves crashing. Similarly, when listening to others, we can choose different filters. A friend may garner empathetic listening with your focus on emotion and connection, while a coworker may receive a more critical filter where you seek to assess and validate their ideas. Treasure, who calls this exercise the most important, challenges you to become aware of the filters you use and when, and to proactively adjust them. Filters, he says, “actually create our reality in a way, because they tell us what we're paying attention to right now.” 

Law Professor Creates New Law School Prestige Ranking

A recent study by two law professors, Brian Frye (University of Kentucky) and C.J. Ryan (Indiana University) found that the U.S. News and World Report’s Law School rankings have become increasingly irrelevant for prospective law students. 

The study examined the relationship between changes in a school’s U.S. News ranking and the academic credentials of the next year’s incoming class. An increase in ranking should bring in more highly qualified applicants and lead to a stronger incoming class. However, using a decade’s worth of data, the study found, at best, a weak positive relationship between rankings and student decision-making and, more often, a negative relationship between the two. In other words: the rankings have outlived their usefulness as a driver of applicant behavior. 

Frye hypothesized that prospective students use the rankings predominantly as a gauge of prestige and published a second paper introducing a replacement. He used only one metric to build his law school prestige ranking: mentions in the New York Times. His team calculated the number of mentions each school received in the NYT between May 2023 and 2024. Mentions could be positive or negative (all publicity is good publicity), and he deemed concerns such as regional bias and naming conventions “illusory” because, well, in his words: “prestige is a scarce good, reserved to those who deserve it.” 

In the ranking, Harvard Law captured the top spot followed by Yale and Stanford Law Schools. While the top schools don’t veer far from the U.S. News, there are other, less expected entrants to the T14. Check below for the top schools and you can find the full list of all 196 schools here (although, note that all schools with zero mentions are tied at rank 103). 

NYT Rank (# Mentions) Law School Name US News Rank 

1 (122) Harvard Law School 4 

2 (96) Yale Law School 1 

3 (77) Stanford Law School 1 

4 (50) Columbia Law School 8 

5 (29) New York Law School 127 

6 (22) Univ of Michigan Law School 9 

7 (15) Cardozo School of Law 61 

8 (13) Brooklyn Law School 114 

9 (12) Univ of Minnesota Law School 16 

10 (11) S. Texas College of Law Houston 150 

11 (10) Univ of Chicago Law School 3 

11 (10) UCLA School of Law 13 

11 (10) Georgetown Univ Law Center 14 

14 (9) NYU School of Law 9

Activate Your Listening Skills

We’re excited to introduce “Emotional Intelligence (EI) Fridays” on the blog, where we will hone in on how to develop and implement these softer skills. 

Our first topic of focus will be listening, a critical skill for doctors, lawyers, and (future) CEOs alike. We hope you enjoy this three-part series.

Click here to read Part 1 of this series. 

To become a more effective listener, keep in mind that listening requires engaging on multiple dimensions. Robin Abrahams and Boris Groysberg described the three components of listening in a Harvard Business Review article: Cognitive (taking in and comprehending the information); Emotional (maintaining calm to receive the information and managing emotional reactions to the information or its delivery); and Behavioral (demonstrating interest and picking up verbal and nonverbal cues). Maintaining awareness and control in these three dimensions promotes good listening. 

In the same article, Abrahams and Groysberg provide a “cheat sheet” of nine actions you can do to improve your listening in the short term. 

1. Repeat the speaker’s last few words back to them. The authors note that this practice demonstrates to people that you’re listening, keeps you engaged, and can provide moments to “gather thoughts or recover from an emotional reaction.” 

2. Steer clear of restating or summarizing in your own words what the speaker said— unless you need to. This practice should only be used if you are not sure that you’re understanding. Abrahams and Groysberg suggest that if you do use it, explicitly state that you’re restating to confirm your own comprehension.

3. Offer nonverbal communication if you are comfortable doing so. If it feels natural, use eye contact and nodding to demonstrate that you’re listening. If not, don’t distract yourself with internal reminders to nod or make eye contact. 

4. Look for nonverbal communication from the speaker. Take note of the speaker’s tone of voice, posture, facial expressions, and other body language or unspoken cues. The authors note the nonverbal can provide additional insight into the emotion and/or motivation behind the information.

5. Ask questions—more than you think you need to. Asking questions not only allows the speaker to feel listened to, it ensures that you comprehended the message and are not overlooking aspects of the information. 

6. Be aware of distractions and try to minimize them. In addition to the digital and workplace distractions we all face, when you’re listening, try to focus on the conversation and speaker, rather than allowing your growing to-do list or another conversation to take over your mind. 

7. Acknowledge your shortcomings to the speaker. Let the speaker know where you are coming from. Have you been in too many meetings today? Did you not have time to read the pre-meeting brief? Are you distracted by your roommate or kids in the next room? Let them know what you’re dealing with so you can both do your best to overcome existing obstacles.

8. Don’t rehearse your response while the other person is talking. The authors note that you think faster than others speak, but don’t fall prey to the temptation to prepare your response in advance. Take a few moments after they’ve spoken to compose your thoughts and use any extraneous brainpower to listen fully. 

9. Monitor your emotions. Emotions can make it difficult to listen. Our brains can quickly engage in defensive behavior, pointing out the ways that the speaker is wrong and we’re correct. So, be aware of your emotions, acknowledge that you’re feeling emotional, breathe through it, and try to stay engaged with what the speaker is saying.